Running Backwards
by Sarah Sanderson
Summary: Renesmee's life was perfect. Loving husband, a caring family and eternity to enjoy it. That was until the Volturi got involved. Dark secrets from her family's past are coming back to haunt her and she has to fight for her very right to exist.
1. Prologue – Renesmee – Looking Back

**Running Backwards**

**Prologue – Renesmee – Looking Back.**

I remember my life so clearly before. So sweet, so full of light and laughter. I was born at the new dawn of my family; my existence solving almost all of their problems and pulling them out of their own personal dark age. I was loved. I was beautiful. I was happy.

Then it all went wrong. Of course it did. Just because I had never known pain to be a part of my life didn't mean it couldn't happen. Everyone in my life had felt pain, before my time. How could I have not seen it coming? Because at the end of the day, you can only be so happy without someone trying to steal it all, only be so happy with out jealousy and treachery to plunge you into the darkness of a total eclipse.

It all came down to jealousy in the end. The jealousy of one, extremely powerful, man. Aro had it all; he was king of his very own world. But Carlisle Cullen, my father for all intents and purposes, was the one who walked away; who turned his back on Aro's world and went to make one all of his own. His own little patch of heaven.

It should have been obvious that Aro would become jealouse. Of course he was. _We had it all. _First there was Carlisle, then he found a friend and a son in saving a dying 17 year old boy named Edward Anthony Masen. He gave Edward a new life and gained a family. Next Carlisle found love in Esme Platt Evenson and made her his wife almost instantly.

Soon Carlisle was on a roll. He stumbled across the beautiful Rosalie Hale, who had been engaged to be married at 18 and had been beaten and left for dead by her fiancé a week before the wedding. Such beauty in such darkness. The Cullen clan was now at even numbers.

It wasn't long before his adopted daughter found a new love in a man named Emmett McCarty, who had come out the worse after an encounter with a rather large grizzly bear. Beautiful Rose brought her Emmett home to Carlisle and Emmett McCarty became Emmett Cullen and Rose's husband.

Then the little freak Alice saw that the best place for her and her, extremely war sick, true love Jasper Whitlock was as part of the Cullen Clan, so they turned up and asked what rooms they could have. After a bit of confusion Alice became a Cullen and Jasper a Hale and each was adopted by Carlisle as his own.

Happy families? Not quite. Edward was still with out love to his family's distress. When they had all but given up on him pulling a Rose and simply coming home with someone he finally met _her_. She was Isabella "Bella" Marie Swan, she was beautiful and funny and extremely self-concious – hating the spotlight that Edward and the others just loved to put her in. She seemed perfect, one problem: She was human.

It wasn't long until Aro's little army was all over the situation, claming that Bella must either become a vampire or be killed. Not a good prospect. As a result of Edward's stalling the change he and Bella managed to get married and conceived a child.

That's where I come into the picture. My name is Renesmee Carlie Cullen. I'm a half-human half-vampire and my soul mate and absolute love of my life is a werewolf named Jacob Black.

So that's how not long after my 8th birthday I found my self in a large field, in a wedding dress, brandishing a baseball bat at my ball-holding aunt Alice and preparing for the best wedding after-party in the history of forever. I had just married the man of my dreams and now me and the family, his and mine, where going to kick back and play monster baseball. Cool huh?

Because of my rather unusual genetics I had reached full physical maturity at the age of 7 and supposedly mental maturity then too, but there's been some debate on that point. My Jacob had been pressured into holding off the wedding for a whole year by my overprotective family because of the whole "What would the neighbours think" thing. Frankly I don't think it made any difference to the horror in my human grandfather's eyes when we told him that I was a whole 8 years old instead of a little old 7. His face still went beetroot red.

He and all the other humans we knew, and actually liked, had attended the wedding but had all been shooed away at the end so that we all could drop 'the human act' and let our wild sides loose. This meant hitting balls so hard in baseball that it sounded like thunder cracks and running to catch said ball at speeds faster than the average car. Not our cars though – we all _love_ fast cars. That might have something to do with how when we say "I can walk faster than this" we're not over exaggerating.

The rules of baseball are simple enough but when werewolves get involved you just know things are going to get messy. For one, the feel it is only fiar to be in wolf form while playing so they can run as fast as us 'cold ones'. I swear the insults I've heard pass between my two families make me laugh sometimes. 'Mongrel' and 'Leach' spring to mind a lot and 'Dog' and 'Blood Sucker' come up rather a lot too. Of course it's all in good fun. There hasn't been any proper fighting between the Cullens and the Quileute wolf pack since before I was born.

I used to wonder why that was but I learnt, through a lot of listening at doors, that the reason for the peace was because my Jacob was MY Jacob from the moment he first saw me. He imprinted, proving us to be soul-mates, and therefore meaning that the pack wouldn't hurt me or my family for fear of Jacob's revenge and possible suicide.

I remember crying over the lack of freewill in the matter for Jacob's part. I wish I had cried more now, now that I know the full extent of it all. Now I know the whole truth and I've learnt that some secrets really need to be kept. But all that came later, after my sunlit perfect life.

That's my happy place, the baseball game. I can still feel my heels digging into the earth, feel Alice's horrified gaze as I got grass stains on my designer weeding dress, hear my Jacobs laughter as the Black team (now including me) completely and utterly kicked the Cullen team's ass. I can feel the wind rush though my hair as I ran into my Jacob's arms at the end of the game, remember the happy yet awkward silence as I hugged my birth mother goodbye before she went back to her house and me and Jake when back to ours.

My happy place. My only escape. My home in my mind, when I close my eyes to the world and all that went wrong, all that made that day the last of its kind for many, many centuries. When I close my eyes, I'm home again.


	2. Chapter 1 – Bella Home

_**Sorry the prologue was a bit weird. It's supposed to be Renesmee looking back from some point near the end. Now it's Bella's turn as she enjoys her new life.**_

**Chapter 1 – Bella - Home**

I turned over the calendar page with a smile. It was finally August! It felt like I'd been waiting for the blessed month for almost the whole year. This last year had been hard on us all. All of my family had graduated from school and disappeared for awhile, pretending to go to collage or university but really going on 'honeymoons' to exotic locations with interesting hunting possibilities, and then we all retuned to the house in Forks to wait until the move to Glasgow. It had felt like we had had an entire year of just waiting around. I had found my self packing and un-packing things just for something to do.

Of course that was only when Edward wasn't around. Then I had rather more interesting things to do. But even that was limited to whenever Nessie was around. Not that she was in the house very often. She was the main reason we had waited another year before moving. That and the fact that the entire town of Forks seemed to think that Dr. Carlisle Cullen, the head of the family, was experimenting with plastic surgery on us, so we had a good excuse for not aging.

Nessie had wanted to stay as long as possible in Forks for her husband's sake. His whole tribe, the tribe he and his pack of shape shifting wolves when assigned to protect, was in the small reservation of La Push just outside of town. Nessie and Jacob had been living there, away from the rest of the Cullen Clan. That, in truth, had been what had made this last year truly hard; I missed her.

Now that August was finally upon us again the entire Cullen clan, including Jacob Black by marriage, was going to uproot itself and move to the almost constantly rain covered Glasgow, Scotland. The hunting possibilities weren't good but the lack of sun was. Although it was known to be very sunny in the summer, the school we all planned to attend was known for its truancy problems. No one would notice or even care if on the days building up to the summer holidays a few more students didn't bother to show. It was perfect.

We were all going to start again and pretend to be 16 or 17 years old. The younger we started out in a place the longer we could stay there. Nessie was to change from being my daughter to Edward's little sister and Jacob would go from being her husband to being her boyfriend and Carlisle's godson. All wedding rings were to be moved to the right hands until we officially staged getting married to the general public.

Nessie would be living with us again and would have to until at least graduation before she and Jacob could possibly live separately from us. That thought made me happy. Everything about spending time with my darling Nessie made me happy. It made everyone happy. Nessie was perfect.

"What are you thinking about?" my Greek God of a husband asks.

I smiled, opened my mental shield to include Edward, and watched his face as he read my mind. It annoyed him endlessly that my mind was the only one he couldn't read, so I made it a habit to let him in as much as possible. I felt the shield snap back around my mind, keeping all but myself out. I felt safe again.

"You've missed her a lot" He said, in reply to my thoughts. It wasn't a question but I still nodded. He placed one perfect finger on the tiny square that marked the first of August and smiled my favourite crooked smile.

"We've all been looking forward to this move. It's going to be interesting to see how you handle it. You're going to have to be the new interesting girl again, but this time be you'll have to be antisocial and push the other students away."

I rolled my eyes. "It's not like I'm going to have to deal with it all by myself. You'll all be with me. We'll be a new _family_, not just one new girl. And besides, with Rose and Nessie in the room no one's going to notice me"

"I'll notice you" he said smiling again.

I laughed "I should hope so" I grinned and kissed him.

"All right! All right! Stop the snogging the kids are coming in!"

I broke apart from my husband but didn't look at the door. I didn't need to.

"Hey Jake. Hey Nessie."

"Hey Mo- I mean, hey Bella." Nessie had been trying to call us by our names and not mom and dad. She was supposed to be Edward's sister in Glasgow so calling him Dad might be problematic. "How's it going?"

"Same old, same old" Edward smiled and turned to hug his daughter. "Missing you, you know."

Nessie smiled awkwardly. Edward could read her mind but that didn't mean he could understand it. Nessie didn't appreciate being everyone's personal gift from God. It made her feel like she was letting everyone down some how – or rather that she would one day let everyone down. I couldn't understood her when she felt like that, I mean I never liked the spotlight but she… well she loves to be loud and the centre of what ever is going on but she just doesn't like it when people have such high expectations of her. It made no sense to any of us, Nessie was perfect. She could do no wrong.

She smiled up at me, probably guessing what I was thinking. She was good at that. Better than her father even, when he wasn't simply reading minds that is.

Edward spoke then, breaking the awkward silence I hadn't realised was there. "Did you have a reason for visiting or did you just feel like dropping in?"

"We were wondering if well…" She broke off and looked at her Jacob. It was still strange to see her look at him that way. Not that she knew. But not that long ago, it seems, he was _my_ Jacob.

"There's a barbeque down at La Push tomorrow night and Sam said we can bring some Cullens if we wanted, not all of them, just one or two. I don't think Paul could handle it if you all turned up but Jake and I where just wondering if you wanted to come." She looked at me quizzically.

At first I felt happy that Sam still felt kindly towards us and include us in his party but then when Nessie looked at me I felt some what unsure. It had been along time since I'd been in La Push and longer since I'd attended one of their pack parties that served not only as fun but as a council meeting. Last time I was at one I was still human. I was still Jake's girl.

I answered with a smile, trying not to make it too forced. "Yes, I'd love to come. Edward?" I looked at my husband and he nodded. We both pretended that it didn't sting a little when Nessie had not included herself as a Cullen. She wasn't anymore really, but she was still one of us underneath it all, and sometimes I wanted to remind her of that so much that I had to stop myself. Remember Jacob. Love came before family. I knew that all too well. After this move I would probably never see my Dad again.

"Of course you'll have to go hunting first, just to make sure. Just in case, you know." Jake smiled, embarrassed that he had to say it. He did that a lot; say things not because he wanted to but because it was his job to. I hated it when he did that, it made me think of the days before Nessie when I was constantly fighting for him to be _my_ Jacob and not Sam's; my friend, not the hostile werewolf.

"Well I guess we'll see you tomorrow night then." Nessie said, uncomfortably.

"Yeah, sure honey. See you then" I said, trying to sound sincere. I hated it when she had to leave. My thoughts were left with her always. She was my baby, still. I just wished she could see how much she meant to me.

Nessie and Jake walked out the door and I could smell, rather then see, them heading east to their home. Edward put his hand on my shoulder. "Alice wants you, love. We should head down stairs before she comes to find you." Edward grinned. I could tell he was changing the subject.

"Let me guess" I smiled, playing along. "She wants to start planning our next graduation party two years in advance?" Alice will be Alice.

"Not quite. She finished the ground plans for that party five weeks back. She can't do more until she's seen the venue." He grinned again.

"So what does she want us for?"

"Oh, she's moving on the wedding now. She's thinks to have us get married some time in the fall, so we can be outside." I moaned. How far ahead does this girl think?

"But what about Rose and Emmett's wedding? Aren't they first?" I was snatching at straws. I hated weddings. Especially my own. Edward did make them more endurable though…

"They still are. Alice is going big on the theatrics this time round. She's going to have them run off to Vegas just after graduation" I was stunned.

"That was what we were going to do!" I have laughed out and he grins down at me.

"Bella, Edward, could you come down here please?" I hear Alice's voice from down stairs as clear as a bell despite the fact she was only speaking at normal volume. I laughed again and started down with Edwards hand tightly in mine. This was going to be a _long_ day.

**Ok so not much drama yet I know but I'm working on it. It's all going to kick off at the barbeque I promise. Meanwhile, you seen that lovely blue review button? Doesn't it just look like it wants to be clinked?**


	3. Dear Reader

**Dear Reader,**

I know it has been absolutely ages (possibly even a year) since I added to this and for that I am **truly sorry**. My mind was else where and I have found it hard to rip my mind from Harry Potter Madness and focus of Twilight. (Yes, I am one of those people who like BOTH.)

I am posting this to say that I am going to **continue** writing this fan fiction. I do however have a lot of stuff going on right now so I'm going to start asking for at least **3 reviews** before an new chapter is posted (because I know there are at least 3 readers). So if your interested in more of this fan fiction (**and a possible sequel…**) **PLEASE** review this with anything from a rant about how long it took me to update to a simple "Yay more chapters".

**Sincerely, **

_**Sarah Sanderson**_


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